Top Ten Ways to Know You've Had It With Winter*

*Johnstown Tribune-Democrat, February 21, 2010

Copyright © 2010 by Ralph Couey

Top Ten ways to know you’re done with winter.

10. You had to Google “Sunlight.”

9. In your nightmares, you’re being chased by evil snow plows.

8. Your wife caught you sitting on your motorcycle and saying “Vroom! Vrooom!”

7. You’ve given up getting mad at the borough plows for blocking the driveway.

6. You’ve developed a latent hostility towards Florida and California.

5. 30 degrees feels warm.

4. You think snowflakes are actually space invaders.

3. You dug through 58 inches of snow to remind yourself what grass looks like.

2. You went out to the garage and fired up the lawn mower “just for old time’s sake.”

And the number one way you know you're done with winter...

Your new name for the WJAC-TV Severe Weather Team is...

(Drum Roll)

The Three Horsemen of the Snowpocalypse.