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Husband, father, grandfather, friend...a few of the roles acquired in 62 years of living.  I keep an upbeat attitude, loving humor and the singular freedom of a perfect laugh.  I don't let curmudgeons ruin my day; that only gives them power over me.  Having experienced death once, I no longer fear it, although I am still frightened by the process of dying.  I love to write because it allows me the freedom to vent those complex feelings that bounce restlessly off the walls of my mind; and express the beauty that can only be found within the human heart.

Astronomy Picture of the Day

Friday, December 03, 2010

The Perfect Husband

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and one man turns, reaches down and engages the speakerpnone. Everyone else in the room listens in.

MAN: "Hello"

WOMAN'S VOICE: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"

MAN: "Yes"

WOMAN'S VOICE: "I'm at the mall and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only $1,000.  Is it OK if I buy it?"

MAN: "Sure."

WOMAN'S VOICE: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the one I really liked."

MAN: "How much?"

WOMAN'S VOICE: "$160,000"

MAN: "OK, but get all the options."

WOMAN'S VOICE:  "Great! Oh, and one more thing.  The house we wanted last year is back on the market.  They're asking $990,000."

MAN: "Offer $900,000."

WOMAN'S VOICE:  Have you decided what we're doing for our anniversary?

MAN:  "Tahiti, First Class.  Order the tickets."

WOMAN'S VOICE: "Oh Honey, you're the perfect husband!  I love you!  Bye!"

MAN: "Bye."

The man hangs up, then notices that the other men are looking at Him in blank astonishment.  Glancing around, he asks:

"Anyone know whose phone this is?"
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