WRCB TV Chattanooga, TN
Copyright © 2020
by Ralph F. Couey
Written content only
It was an odd-feeling weekend, to be sure. The City and County of Honolulu announced a curfew for the Easter weekend, running from 11 pm to 5 am, which meant that everyone except essential personnel had to be off the streets. I was fortunate to be off for three nights, taking the Good Friday state holiday on my Sunday. I have to tell you though, I kinda wish I had gone to work anyway. Kinda.
We stayed in the house, honoring the standing stay-at-home order issued previously. I was able to get out to do my exercise, which was remarkably refreshing. Easter Sunday, we viewed two services, one put on by our international church headquarters, and the other done by one of our local congregations. There are some that claim that this will be the new paradigm for churches, going online instead of gathering in brick-and-mortar congregations. It was a noble effort, but to be honest, it really fell short in the one critical area of religious life, fellowship. I really haven't realized how important that is to our religious life. We are a small congregation so by nature we are involved in each other's lives. In a good way. While it was good to see everyone online, my heart ached for human contact; the handshakes, the hugs, the ministry of presence that the members of a church community provide to each other. We check in by phone often, but I miss the hugs, I miss the conversations, I miss the shared affection we have for each other.
Cheryl and I love each other, and really enjoy each other's company. But we miss the part of us that exists with our friends, and the sense of adventure of going somewhere new. I, for one, will never again underestimate the importance of that. We have each other, and we need each other. But we also need everyone else, because for us, that's where life exists in its most joyful forms.
That was really the highlight of the weekend. The rest of the time, we stayed indoors except for one short foray to the local grocery store. We are eating well -- perhaps too well, according to my bathroom scale. Cheryl cooked up the world's most perfect steaks on Saturday, tender to the point of melting in the mouth. We also did a little yard work, what little there was to be done. I read, watched a couple of movies, did some work on my book projects, even did some exercises. But despite those noble efforts, the days dragged by mercilessly. I became aware of how cut off I feel when I returned to work tonight and for the first 90 minutes or so, talked the ears off my co-workers. Part of that was for the purposes of filling in the gaps needed for continuity in our watch structure. But I was anxious for information on how things were where they lived and what had happened work-wise while I was off. But this was unusual. Usually there is a few minutes of catch-up conversation before we turn to the systems we are charged with monitoring as silence fills the space. Not so tonight.
I've had things like this before when we lived back east, and epic snowstorms would render us incommunicado for a few days. But we still had neighbors as we all fell out to help each other clear snow. Now, of course, we have to keep our distance from each other. That day we went to the grocery store, we were the only ones not wearing masks. Nothing devil-may-care in our intent, but we are both educated enough to know that there are very few facial coverings with a fine enough weave to catch and hold a virus. The Corona Virus averages about 0.1 microns, which is 10 to the negative six meters. So that's pretty small, and any weave narrow enough to catch something like that needs to be donated to a hospital. A dust mask from Home Depot or one from your local drug store aren't effective. They do fine against bacteria, but bacteria are 50 times larger than a virus. But we're not completely tone deaf. We get that the mask is really there to make everyone else feel safer. But we still felt the hard stares of others in the store. Now we see that particular chain is now requiring customers to wear the masks.
This has been harder than I ever thought it would be, and this is coming for someone who can still get out five nights per week to work. I can't imagine how hard it is for the rest of you who are stuck inside for the whole week. I read that domestic incidents are way up these days. Go figure. I know that parts of the government are trying to get the economy gradually opened and ramped up. But I think that's not only for the improvement of the economy, but also to make things better at home.
I miss being able to go out. I miss the sense of freedom inherent in getting out of the four walls of our homes. I don't miss the traffic, so I guess I have to take the bad with the good. But I guess what I really miss is people. The poet John Donne once wrote, "Any man's death diminishes me, for I am involved in mankind." In these times, perhaps that could be amended to say, "Any separation from people diminishes me, for I am involved in humankind." I have heard pregnant ladies say, usually about the eighth month that they're tired of waiting and they just want the baby to be born. I get that very clearly now, because I am getting tired of waiting for the virus to run its course so we can get back to each other. Unfortunately, I can tell you that what I want in life is rarely what I get.
There seems to be some changes in the wind. There is a growing disagreement among the experts on whether the stats suggest that we're nearing, or in the turning point, where the number of new cases decline, as do the deaths. We've been fooled by these models before. Statistical modeling is one of the most meddling-vulnerable of the sciences. In any model, you start with basic assumptions. But if your assumptions are apocalyptic, then your results will be apocalyptic. I would remind you that none of these models have to date accurately predicted an outcome. So, I am suspicious of these "predictions." But to many, especially the media, the models are all they have. Also, media makes most of its revenue during times of crisis, so it is in their best interests to make things sound bad as long as they can. It falls on us, the consumer of such information to critically think these things and not accept them at face value, especially since they have exhibited such a poor record of performance.
Maybe I'm just projecting here, articulating an emotional need to return to the freedoms I once took for granted. Heck, I'd even go to the dentist or proctologist today if it meant getting out of the house for awhile. Patience is it's own virtue and I will have to rein in my restive horses in order to get through this.
You see, it's not just the number of illnesses, but the deaths that upset me. For the most part, they are people of my generation, and despite my dedicated attempts to improve my health, and that I don't have any serious underlying issues, I still feel a sense of loss, and a deep empathy for the families of those who have passed. I pray that they may find a sense of peace out of all this. But these are almost all people who should have had a decade or more to live. Our human family has been cheated out of their presence. And here I go, criticizing God again...
So begins another week of the Great Pandemic of 2020. Like you, I will work hard to find an equilibrium that will sustain me. Somewhere, I will find something new to attempt, perhaps a closet long overdue for a complete cleanout. Perhaps my muse of inspiration will pay a visit and help me to make substantial progress on my three book projects.
And maybe, just maybe, by week's end we'll have seen our path out of this crisis.
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